Tales of an Old Married Couple – #2

For twenty years, Husband and I have slept on the same of the bed. Even when we stay in a hotel, we sleep on the same side of the bed. While we were in Florida, the first night, Husband was working on one bed and I was on the other bed watching a movie…I was on Husband’s side of the bed. As it got late, I started to fall asleep and told him to sleep in the other bed. You would have thought I had asked him to pack his bags and leave! So, I told him he could come to the other bed, but he had to sleep on “my side.” It was the worst night! All night long, he kept pushing me out of bed as he attempted to move to his side of the bed…all while sleeping. At one point, I actually had my foot on the floor supporting me. In the morning, when my alarm rang, I reached for the side table and almost poked him in the eye. I, too, forgot what side of the bed I was on!

PC vs PG

A few weeks ago, I read a review in a parenting magazine about a DVD containing a collection of Saturday morning shows from the 50’s. It included a warning that the DVD contained “outdated stereotypes and gunfights.” It made me think about the shows that we are currently watching with our kids in relationship to today’s popular shows.

This concept of “outdated stereotypes” in the old sitcoms is true…particularly ones that have military themes, such as F-Troop and McHale’s Navy. (There are also gunfights in some of these shows.) I guess by today’s standards these shows are not very politically correct. However, I am finding that it is pretty easy to explain to the boys why certain ethnic labels were used during war times and are totally inappropriate today. I also am finding that since these shows portray all of characters in such an extreme comical manner, the boys don’t take any stereotypes seriously. If it is necessary, it creates an opportunity to discuss how stereotypes and namecalling can be hurtful to others.

As I have been thinking about this, I have weighed this PC issue against the PG nature of today’s popular shows...

• In the old shows, parents are respected and not treated as unintelligent. For example, Shirley Partridge is the authority figure in her home and her children respect her. There is a wide range of ages in the Partridge family children and they are all held accountable and are expected to be obedient.
• In the old shows, the father’s role in the family is valued. This is most obvious in The Cosby Show…enough said.
• In the old shows, there is not the undercurrent of sexuality for young people. In McHale’s Navy, the sailors chase the nurses, but on The Partridge Family, the young kids do not feel pressured to date. I found it interesting, in a recent episode, when 18-year old Keith got his own place to live, he did not want his mother to catch him with a girl alone.
• In the old shows, there are some mature themes, but they are presented in a way that can be digested and processed by kids. Topics such as teen pregnancy, underage drinking, and drugs are presented as issues to be addressed, not as the norm to be accepted. We have had the opportunity to discuss many of these issues after watching The Cosby Show. We have also had many interesting discussions about stills, moonshine and poker in our house after watching McHale's Navy...not necessarily what I expected, but it has been fun.
• In the old shows, there was a more definite standard of right and wrong. In today's shows - which reflects the world at large - there is so much relativism. Kids are led to believe that everything is ok as long as you believe it and "tolerance" is the highest moral quality...however, tolerance is typically defined by the latest fad or celebrity.
• There is often a theme of deception in today's shows…how to fool parents, how to get around the system, how to avoid doing homework. This is not a new concept, but today they are taking it to a whole new level. When the Brady kids got into trouble, their schemes were pretty obvious; today, the defiance and deception is more of an undercurrent that draws kids in.
  

I am trying to find a balance between the two…old and new. There are things to be learned and enjoyed from the old shows. Similarly, there are things to be enjoyed and lessons to be learned from the current shows…it just takes vigilance. PG…parental guidance.

Tales of an Old Married Couple #1

Husband and I recently returned from a long weekend in Florida. We attended a wonderful conference that was filled with amazing teaching and music. Each night, they left a “pillow gift” of either a book authored by one of the speakers or a CD by a musician. They also left two chocolates…the idea being two room occupants, two chocolates.

The first night, we returned to our room to find a book and two chocolates. I put on my pjs and stepped in the bathroom…looking forward to sitting on my bed, watching tv, and eating my chocolate. I returned and Husband had eaten BOTH chocolates! I asked him…”What were you thinking? Have you met me? Is there any time in our 20 year marriage that I have NOT liked chocolate?” He had nothing to say. I also had nothing to say to him for the rest of the night. I, of course, had plenty to say to everyone at breakfast about his dastardly deed.

The next night, I went up to our room between the night session and the dessert reception. Imagine my delight to find the pillow gift and two chocolates! I grabbed both chocolates, put them in my pocket, and returned to the reception. When I said good-night, several people asked about my chocolate plans…I smiled and showed them the chocolates in my pocket. I am not above petty revenge!